Tuesday, October 26, 2010

crazy new zealand lingo

i was attacked by this crazy language from the moment i stepped off the plane. since then i've been on the hunt for kiwi words. probly going to incorporate all of the following into my everyday language back home, so learn it and love it. in the order i learned them:

-jandals: flip flops
-fanny: vag
-heaps: lots
-ice block: popsicle
-chilly bins: coolers
-dairy: tiny, two lane grocery store that cost me $15 for a bag of rice (to put my drowned ipod in), cookies, and chocolate hokey pokey biscuits
-capsicum: bell peppers
-kumera: sweet potatoes
-rubbish: garbage
-rubbers: erasers (it's really strange to hear 6 year-olds asking each other if they have a rubber)
-toilet: bathroom
-mates: friends
-partner: boyfriend/girlfriend
-pissed: drunk
-scrapping: fighting
-letter box: mailbox
-spewed: vomitted
-the bot: sick
-knackered: tired (however it's really hard to know that they're actually saying knackered because it sounds exactly like naked. this confusion tends to make things awkward for me)
-top up: minutes on a cell phone - especially a janky one from several years ago that takes me 30 minutes to send a text and whose 11 number phone number i still don't know
-accomodation: hotel
-p: crazy new zealand drug
-ripped: drunk
-maths: math. apparently the kids don't understand that it means the same thing without the s. and "maths" is just dumb. not gonna use that one
-full stop: period (like the punctuation)
-cheers: thanks, yes, okay, cool
-shit: oh shit. to be said by everyone - adults, kids, news anchors on tv
-chips: french fries
-pie: pastry filled with soupy meat. steak and cheese for my first one. phil adds ketchup.
-sauce: ketchup, mayo
-lamington: weird box shaped cake with coconut on the outside. raspberry for my first one.
-chocolate fish: chocolate candy shaped like a fish with pink marshmallow on the inside. also a phrase for a job well done
-crump: crunk (the old lady version)
-togs: swimsuit
-elastics: big resistance bands kids jump in and out of for fun
-zorb: roll around in a giant plastic ball like my hamster squeaky used to
-lollies: sweets, candy (not chocolate)
-hoon: wrecklessly speed
-rooting: having sex
-slapper: skank, slut
-shut-eyes: log cabins
-bach: holiday home on the beach
-trolley: shopping cart
-patty: pout
-tossers: wankers
-bollocks: balls (nuts)/that's bullshit
-willies: penises (and apparently penises are like arms according to miranda's teacher)
-sun cream: sunscreen
-clothes horse: drying rack (because they don't have dryers here)
-boot of the car: trunk
-bric-a-brac: garage sale. really?
-stuffed up: messed up
-jaxy: ass
-gutted: broken up about, heartbroken
-on the piss: drinking
-toerags: douchebags
-drink bottle: water bottle
-reliever: substitute teacher

Other interesting facts about New Zealand:

-shoes aren't required anywhere, including school, restaurants, shops. phil has only had jandals on maybe once since i've been here.
-everyone here travels. half of the people i've met here have been more places in the states than i've been. kinda feel like a jackass.
-half of the people i've met think i'm canadian because of my accent. wrong.
-hot tea is drank all day. school stops in the middle of the morning for half an hour so the teachers can go drink tea.
-i have hay fever here. f.
-there are two options for ways to flush the toilet. (1/2 flush and full flush. For the first week I thought the option I wasn't using was the one that would spit everything back up. Dumb. Why would that be an option?)
-eeeeevery road has a round-a-bout. seriously. it's dizzying and unnecessary.
-the government (?) regulates names of kids so you can't just pick any name for ppl. Jesus Christ has been outlawed as a name.
-when the All Blacks lose a game, the domestic violence rate goes up dramatically
-sacks of oranges and phonebooks can be used as tools for domestic violence that don't leave bruises. very handy.
-i've heard more talk about gingers here than i've ever heard in my entire life. apparently ppl are fascinated with the ginge
-ppl think that Halloween costumes have to actually be scary. all i saw out oct. 30 was bloody guys/girls, vampires, monsters, etc. they don't understand the halloween=opportunity-for-a-major-slutfest concept that is put into place after about 7-years old in the u.s.
-troy today said they had "heaps more" trick-or-treaters than usual on Halloween. when asked how many kids they got, he said one.
-pumpkins here are grey. why would that be different? seriously grey. to the point that Karen's homestay sister painted her pumpkin orange with paint. grey. those are sad pumpkins. and nobody here carves pumpkins. when questioned why, they said, "because we eat pumpkins." k.
-there's a 10 minute burn time in new zealand. it's expected that within 10 minutes of being outside, you receive a sunburn. all the students have to wear hats when they go outside for this reason. (i have yet to get sunburned tho (:
-there are no snakes here
-there's nothing poisonous at all in new zealand (and this seems to be a point of great pride with the ppl here)
-it's legal to drink in the car. in fact, it's a great time to pregame on the way to the bar :)

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